Heart Ache (Bound by a Touch Novels #1) Read online

  Heart Ache

  Copyright©2012 Morgan Kearns

  Kindle Edition

  Praises for HEART ACHE:

  “Looking for the ultimate villain? Heart Ache delivers!”

  ~Nichole Severn, author of Let Me Out

  “Heart Ache is aptly named, for my heart felt every step of Nikolai and Gabrielle’s heartrending journey…”

  ~Deena Remiel, author of Trinity

  “A feast of murder mystery with sensual romance, this story has it all.”

  ~Siobhan Muir, author of Her Devoted Vampire

  Praises for MORGAN KEARNS:

  “I could read Morgan Kearns all day

  and never tire of it.”

  ~Deena Remiel, author of Trinity

  “Whatever Morgan puts in ink I will read.”

  ~Good Choice Reading

  Praises for IN IT TO WIN IT:

  “If sweet and romance had a baby,

  this book would be the finished product.”

  ~Romance Novel Junkies

  “…a gigantic 10.” ~skyla11377 book reviews

  Praises for FADE TO BLACK:

  “…a rollercoaster ride full of sensations.”

  ~Coffee Time Romance

  “…an amazingly powerful love story…”

  ~Book Crazy

  Heart Ache is a work of fiction. The characters and events are the product of the author’s imagination and are used fictitiously. Any similarities to any persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

  Published in the United States through:

  Goodnight Publishing

  Copyright © 2012 Morgan Kearns

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any form or by any means without the written consent of the author, except for brief quotations used in critical articles or reviews.

  Cover art by Tricia Schmitt aka Pickyme

  www.wix.com/pickyme/port

  www.morgankearns.com

  ISBN: 1-4681-2335-1

  EAN13: 9781468123357

  Visit www.MorganKearns.com to order additional copies.

  He knelt down on the floor and ran his fingers through the tangles of her auburn hair, traced the subtle lines of her face, caressed the freckles so lovingly sprinkled over her pert nose. He would never tire of looking at her, studying her. She smiled in her sleep, taking on the innocence of an angel, and leaned into his touch.

  His thoughts drifted to their first touch, to the warming sensation that blossomed in his chest—a flower opening to replace centuries of emptiness with hope, light, love. In that moment, he’d felt something; something strange, something miraculous, something more than a bit scary. Something that meant she was exactly what he needed.

  Forever.

  To Nikolai: Your Happily-Ever-After has been a long time coming. Thanks for being patient! Enjoy forever. You deserve it.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  To anyone who has ever read one of my books:

  THANK YOU!

  To Wanda, Raquel, & Monique:

  You guys are fabulous! Thanks for loving my writing.

  To Kathryn, Dawn, & Megan: Thanks so much for your feedback, but more importantly, thank you for being my friend!

  To Tricia: Your covers are awesome. Thank you.

  To Nichole: I would’ve had to change a name had I met you first. *wink* Thank you for your input on this project. I couldn’t have done it without you!

  To Siobhan: Your friendship has come to mean a lot to me. Thank you for always having the words to make me smile when I’m frustrated.

  To the best cheerleaders ever, my four kids: You’re my greatest accomplishments! Thanks for letting me tackle a few more.

  To my husband, my best friend, the love of my life: Thank you for encouraging me to follow my dreams! I love you!

  Heart Ache

  Bound by a Touch Novels

  Book One

  Morgan Kearns

  Chapter One

  THUMP-THUMP.

  Thump-thump.

  Nikolai rubbed his chest, directly above his beating heart and smiled. He loved the affect Gabrielle Ryan had on him.

  He raised his knuckles and rapped on her door. Again. He knew she was in there. As if his heart wasn’t proof enough, he could sense her.

  As another few seconds ticked by, he began to worry. If something had happened to her— He could easily enter her apartment, but would leave that for a last resort.

  Another set of knocks, verging on the realm of pounds.

  He was just about to bust the damned door down when he heard the lock tumble and the soft squeak of the hinge.

  “Niko, what are you…? Pl—” Gabby sneezed. “Excuse me, please come in.”

  She flung the door wide and Nikolai stepped over the threshold. White tissues dotted the floor around her coffee table and formed a makeshift snowdrift atop it. A pink fluffy blanket had been thrown aside and a pillow still held a head mark at one end of the couch.

  She hurried over to the coffee table and yanked another tissue from the box. After an adorable honking she crumpled it into her hand and began tidying her living room.

  “Gabby, it’s okay. I’m not here to inspect your housekeeping skills. I only came by to make sure you were okay.”

  She smiled, her eyes red and watery. She sneezed again before melting onto the couch. He took a seat in the large leather chair that interestingly enough matched the one in his office. He reached out and handed her a bag with a Styrofoam container of chicken noodle soup.

  “I thought you could use something homemade.”

  “You cooked?”

  He laughed. “Not exactly.”

  The bag crinkled as she pulled it open and stuck her face into it. He grinned at the snuffling that accompanied her deep inhale.

  “Oh. That smells so good.” She took another breath and her nostrils whistled. Red splashed her cheeks. She held up the bag. “Thank you, this was very kind of you.”

  Kind had nothing to do with what brought him to stand on her doorstep, food in hand. Gabby was his female, his to protect, even if it was only from a flu bug.

  “How are you feeling? Better?” He stared into her bloodshot eyes, noting her red nose, and wild disarray of curls barely contained by a rubber band.

  Did she have any idea how adorable she was?

  She coughed, sneezed … and farted. Her blush from earlier was nothing compared to the crimson she sported now.

  “Excuse me.” She blew her nose and looked up at him. The misery in her watery eyes made him mental. “I hate being sick.”

  “Is there anything I can do for you?” He forced himself to rub his palms against his thighs instead of pulling her to his chest and comforting her for the duration of her illness.

  “No, I’m fine. Just sick of being sick.” She pushed a lock of hair out of her face with the back of her hand and sneezed again.

  “Why don’t you sit down and I’ll put the soup in a bowl for you.”

  “I can—”

  “I insist.” Niko held the bright pink blanket while she settled against the pillows. Tucking her in was one of the greatest pleasures of his life. He resisted pressing a kiss to her forehead, but only barely.

  In the tiny, tidy kitchen, Nikolai stared at the closed cupboard doors and took a guess which one would house the bowls. He grinned like a fool when he was right.

  A bowl, a spoon, and a splash of soup later, Nikolai returned to her side. She’d rolled onto her side, her face pressed into the pillow, her mouth hanging open. The soft snore and whistle combination made his heart ache.

  Goddess, he loved her.

  He knelt down on the floor and ran his finger
s through the tangles of her auburn hair, traced the subtle lines of her face, caressed the freckles so lovingly sprinkled over her pert nose. He would never tire of looking at her, studying her. She smiled in her sleep, taking on the innocence of an angel, and leaned into his touch.

  His thoughts drifted to their first touch, to the warming sensation that blossomed in his chest—a flower opening to replace centuries of emptiness with hope, light, love. In that moment, he’d felt something; something strange, something miraculous, something more than a bit scary. Something that meant she was exactly what he needed.

  Forever.

  Gabby was now his right hand. The last two days had been hell without her. He missed her like crazy! He missed the way his heart beat when she was around, but he’d also missed two meetings, misplaced an important file—until he’d looked on his own damned desk—and had been short tempered with anyone who braved to walk through his door.

  He’d have to remember to apologize to Vincent tomorrow.

  She snorted and rolled over. Her lids opened a crack then popped wide. She jumped, her heart rate skittering.

  “Sorry.” She yawned and rubbed at her eyes. “How long was I out?”

  “Not long.” An eternity wouldn’t be enough to take in all the things he loved about her. “You hungry?”

  She eyeballed the bowl of soup and licked her lips. He had visions of her licking other things.

  Damn, he was a letch. Ogling the poor sick female.

  He helped her settle the bowl in her lap and stood. His next words nearly killed him, but he managed to force them past his tongue. “Why don’t you take the rest of the week. Get better. I’ll still need you when you return on Monday.” More than she could ever know.

  “Thank you.” She tried to stand—probably to walk him to the door—and he motioned for her to stay seated.

  “I can see myself out. Rest well, Gabrielle.”

  Walking out of her apartment was torture, plain and simple. He paused in the hall and stared at her closed door. Running his hand over the cool metal he wished he could go back inside. Instead he walked away, anticipating the dead feeling that accompanied their separation.

  *****

  Goddess, Nikolai hoped Gabby was coming in today.

  He needed her like a drowning man needed air! His entire life had fallen apart in the short time she’d been recovering from the flu. This morning alone, he’d nearly climbed into the damned filing cabinet and still couldn’t find the file he required. He slammed the drawer and scanned his office for where he should search next.

  Thump-thump.

  Thump-thump.

  His blood sensed her a split second before he heard her.

  The door to his office opened. Her tropical scent flooded the room; coconut and lemongrass. Her breath hitched. “Hey. I didn’t expect you to be here this early.”

  His whole body warmed at the sound of her sweet voice. Thankfully his back faced the doorway. He needed a minute to compose himself. He took a deep breath, listening to her movements as she approached.

  “Niko? Are you okay?”

  Every footstep, every whisper of her clothing screamed through the silent air to his sensitive hearing as she crossed the room to him. He braced himself for the moment when he would turn and face the female who haunted his days, his nights, and every moment in between.

  The light touch of her fingers brushing over his shoulder wasn’t necessarily a surprise, but knowledge didn’t stop the sharp intake of breath and his jump at her contact.

  Startled by his reaction, she gasped, a quiet cooing sound that was nearly his undoing.

  He turned with solemn reverence to observe the angel in front of him. He had to remind himself to keep his expression in check as he forced an emotionless smile.

  Gabrielle Ryan, with her shiny auburn hair, her porcelain skin, and slim, toned body, caused every part of him to react to her mere presence. Her blue eyes searched his eyes, his face.

  “I’m sorry. I thought you heard me come in.”

  “You just surprised me.” He couldn’t very well tell her he craved her touch more than his next breath.

  Her hand moved to touch the bare skin where his shirt had been rolled way from his forearm. Her brows crinkled. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes. Are you feeling better?”

  She smiled. “Much.”

  “Glad to hear it. I hope you had a nice weekend?”

  Weekends were an excruciating reality that bit him in the ass two days out of every seven. It was those two days he missed her like a man possessed. It was those two days he fretted over her social calendar. Gabby was beautiful and, to Nikolai’s horror, he wasn’t the only male–vampire or human–who’d noticed.

  “My weekend was okay,” she whispered, using her bejeweled left hand to brush a curl away from her cheek.

  Oh, sweet Goddess, no.

  His stomach rolled, his heart threatened to beat right out of his chest, as he saw the pathetic excuse for a diamond that had been placed on her finger by a male who wasn’t him.

  He choked back his wounded pride and breaking heart. “What’s that on your finger, Gabby?”

  She took a deep breath, holding it for moment before exhaling. Her cheeks flooded with color and her eyes suddenly found the carpeting the most interesting thing in the room.

  “I’m engaged.”

  “Oh,” he breathed–or tried to.

  Her voice hummed as she went on about flowers and knees and rings. All he could do was swallow over and over to keep the bile in his stomach. His worst fear was coming to fruition. While he’d waited for her to come to him, she’d found love in the arms of another male. A human male!

  The grinding of his teeth ricocheted through his head. His knuckles curled, forming tight fists, and, when his nails bit into the flesh of his palms, he realized this wasn’t a horrible nightmare. He cleared his throat and stared into her dark blue eyes.

  For the first time since she’d come to work for him three years ago, and his heart began to beat in her presence, Nikolai took her into his arms. He buried his face in the locks of her hair, enveloping himself in the scent that was exclusively Gabrielle.

  His eyes burned and his throat tightened. He breathed her in, holding a piece of her within himself.

  She didn’t return his embrace; instead she went stiff as a board and stopped breathing. This was nothing like the dream that touched his mind every time he slept; the dream where she accelerated the hug into something more, leading Nikolai to heaven one blessed kiss at a time.

  He had to reach deep for the strength to speak. “You deserve all the happiness this life has to offer.”

  “Thank you.” Her small, warm hands pressed against his chest. He looked down into her face; a blush was aflame amongst the deer-caught-in-the-headlights expression. She tried to smile, which looked more like a grimace.

  With his heart heavy as lead in his chest, he took a step back and reluctantly released his hold on her fingertips. Dammit! He hadn’t meant to embarrass her—or himself—only to convey how much he cared for her. If he didn’t get away from her, he might just grab hold and never let go.

  “I’ve got a lot of work to catch up on.” His footsteps were heavier than he intended as he strode over to the door, basically inviting her to leave. “I do not wish to be disturbed for any reason—” His eyes met hers. “—by anyone.”

  She nodded, leaving the question on her face and in her eyes, unasked.

  He closed the door behind her, waited a heartbeat, and vaporized right into Gustav’s bedroom.

  “What the hell do you want, little brother?” the older vampire snarled from behind the heavy draperies of his king-sized bed. “I will never understand why you prefer to be awake while the damn sun is shining.”

  Nikolai didn’t respond. He simply crossed the room and lowered his large body into the high-, wing-backed, cherry wood chair which lately had a permanent impression of his backside.

  “Let me guess—” Gustav w
hispered something, then chuckled. “—this wouldn’t have anything to do with the captivating Gabrielle, would it?”

  “Shall I add psychic to the list of your many talents, brother?”

  Another low chuckle rumbled from the bed, followed by a feminine sigh. “You need to go, darling.” A high-pitched groan of protest, then a kiss. “We’ll get together again soon.”

  He recognized his brother’s words as a lie.

  “Promise?” Apparently, so did she.

  “Of course. Now, go.”

  Nikolai felt the displacement of matter signifying the female’s departure. Gustav had a harem of beautiful females, all frantic to occupy his bed. Unfortunately for them, none were ever given the honor of more than a few hours.

  His brother’s sexual habits bothered Niko, but in this excruciating moment, he couldn’t care less if the male was a malewhore. His heart seemed to be crumbling in his chest. He hadn’t been able to draw a deep breath since he’d noticed the shiny sign of possession on Gabby’s finger. His molars protested against the unceasing grinding. He was going to lose his mind!

  “I’ve already sent home my companion. Are you going to tell me why you’re keeping me from my beauty sleep?”

  “She’s engaged.” Nikolai cringed at the emotion in his nearly silent voice.

  “Congratulations!” Gustav yanked back the burgundy curtains which made the gold fringe wave violently. “It’s about damn ti-”