Heart Ache (Bound by a Touch Novels #1) Read online

  He could only guess how pitiful he looked and Gustav’s cut off words only validated his torment. He stared at the floor, weaving his fingers through the long strands of his hair and tugged.

  Gustav’s hand clamped down on his brother’s shoulder, squeezing gently. “Oh. I’m sorry, Niko, but…”

  His head snapped up, nailing Gustav with a hard, cold stare. He felt the silver in his dark eyes flash and knew Gustav would be able to read every one of his emotions.

  “Do you think an ‘I-told-you-so’ is really what I need, Gustav?”

  He shook his head. “It’s not too late. You can still bite her.”

  “And watch her die when she refuses to be changed?” Niko’s hands tightened on the arms of the chair until the wood protested. “I could never do that to her. I would rather be alone for eternity than live with the knowledge of her early demise.” He let his head fall loosely against the wall behind the chair, relishing the thud.

  “Just claim her, Nikolai. It’ll work out. It did for—”

  “For who? Tatal?” He growled through clenched teeth. “Yeah, it took years for Mamei to learn to love him, but she never cherished him. She may not have hated him, but that’s not what I want from Gabrielle. She holds my heart, Gustav, and I want hers. But I won’t take it. She has to give it to me.”

  Gustav shoved fingers through hair that resembled a crazed porcupine. “I understand that. Not that I have any interest in such a thing, but you must remember that finding a heartmate—”

  “—is a precious gift,” Niko finished the mantra spoken often by his kind. “I know. I just want her to love me.”

  “She will learn to love you after her change.” Gustav ran his hands through his light brown hair again.

  “She’s already had three years!”

  Nikolai got to his feet, reminding his brother that he was still taller, more formidable than the elder immortal. He got right in Gustav’s face, glaring down into charcoal eyes that flashed black.

  “Don’t you get it? Three damned years I’ve been tormented with the hope of capturing her heart. Instead she has given it to another; someone completely unworthy of her.” His tirade died a quick death and he wished for the same.

  Gustav plopped down in the chair Niko had vacated, crossing bare feet at the ankles. “It’s not like you’ve actually tried to court her.”

  Nikolai glared at his brother. “I’ve sent her flowers.”

  A boisterous, mocking laugh burst from Gustav as he jumped to his feet, his finger coming in contact with Niko’s chest.

  “On Secretary’s Day! That hardly counts as a romantic gesture.”

  “I arranged for her to get roses, everyone else got carnations.”

  Gustav still laughed, and added shaking his head to his repertoire of disapproving movements. “And you expected her to notice that? Come on. You’re talking to the guy who can’t remember the name of the female who just popped out of here.”

  “Exactly.”

  “But I know you don’t send flowers to every woman in the company and expect her to read something special into the ones you sent her.”

  “We’ve had dinner together.” Nikolai quickly re-played the events of the last three years, searching for ammunition against his brother’s arrogance. There wasn’t much.

  “Chinese take-out delivered to the office doesn’t count either.” Gustav tapped Nikolai in the chest, each poke becoming harder. “You have a choice to make, dear brother. Let her go, which will make you utterly miserable for eternity, or find your balls and go after what the Goddess has given you.”

  Nikolai couldn’t look at Gustav, so he concentrated on his brother’s bare feet and legs.

  “So, what are you going to do?” Gustav asked.

  Nikolai pondered the question.

  What would he do now?

  He knew what he should do.

  But could he walk away from the woman fate, and the Goddess, meant to be his?

  Chapter Two

  The flash of pain in his eyes had given her a glimpse of what she’d hoped for, but it was gone faster than it’d appeared. His entire reaction had surprised her. And not in the way she’d hoped.

  When he’d tugged her into his arms and held her against his chest, his heart beat steadily beneath her ear. His shirt had been soft against her cheek. His cologne always made her knees go weak. She’d dreamed of him taking her into his arms, but the action had been so unexpected she’d straightened like a board and pushed him away.

  Idiot!

  Then he’d dismissed her, locking himself away from the world. Away from her.

  It was just plain sad she had to remind herself to be cheerful as she shared her news with her nearest and dearest. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw the expression on Niko’s face. Her heart clenched. She stared at the closed door, wishing she could take the last few minutes back, rewind the clock, and do things so very differently. More than anything she wanted him to wrap her in another embrace, to hold her close, and never let go.

  In her mind’s eye she called up the sadness beneath the attempt at nonchalance. She didn’t understand his expression.

  He had always been so kind to her, but he’d never given her any reason to believe he felt anything beyond a working relationship.

  She, however, was crazy attracted to him; the way he ran his fingers through his jet black hair when he was frustrated, the way his obsidian eyes flashed silver when he was upset, the way his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled. He had a way of making her insides turn to mush, her knees to boiled spaghetti noodles with an innocent wink.

  More than once, she’d been embarrassed by her inability to pay attention when he got too close. It was like he had a built-in tractor beam she couldn’t get away from. She both loved and hated the effect he had on her.

  She’d wanted to escalate things, even daydreamed of stripping down to only her satin and lace in the middle of his office, and announcing, Hey, Niko, make love to me right here, right now! But because she liked her job, needed her job, and he was her boss, she’d had no choice but to keep a tight leash on that pipe dream.

  No matter how hard she’d tried not to think of him in an erotic way, Gabrielle had never been able to ignore the flicks of electricity that pleasured her with his simple, innocent touches.

  “Okay, I’m here!” The announcement came in stereo as Marie opened the door with a flourish, her cell phone still attached to her ear. They’d small-talked as Marie made her way up from the accounting department, housed on the second floor. “Tell me all about it.”

  Gabby laughed and shook her head.

  The black hair of her best friend was pulled back in a ponytail, showcasing perfect olive-toned skin. Marie entered with the strut of a runway model in her cream turtleneck, chocolate skirt, and matching brown boots. She closed her cell phone and dropped it into her pocket.

  “How are you feeling? Are you happy? Are you—?”

  “I’m engaged, Marie. Of course I’m happy.” Gabby sneered a smile.

  “I’m glad you’re happy.” Marie perched herself on the corner of Gabby’s desk. She huffed, crossed her legs at the ankles and her wrists over her knees. “Did you tell McHotty yet?”

  “Yes.”

  One dark brow rose. “And?”

  Gabby’s thoughts followed her gaze to the door that separated her office from Nikolai’s. Part of her wanted to go in there and demand…

  And what exactly are you going to demand?

  She had no idea. She did know she would take off Jayson’s ring and send him packing, if for only a chance of having Niko love her.

  She knew it would never happen. Nikolai Voinea prided himself of being professional and that was that. It had been three years of coming to work every day, hoping he would see her as a woman. He was her boss!

  And probably has a whole flock of floosies just waiting to be pleasured by his caresses. She shuddered at the thought of those strong, long-fingered hands touching female flesh
that wasn’t hers.

  “Gabby? What’d he have to say about your engagement? ”

  She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Let’s go downstairs and get some coffee.”

  Marie looked confused for only a split second. “Okay.” She jumped down, her head tilting quickly in the direction of the closed door. “Should you tell McHotty?”

  “Stop calling him that!”

  Marie snorted.

  Gabby ignored the scoff, wishing she could see through the door, just to know he was okay—or wasn’t. Ha! Like he wouldn’t be okay. The man was probably on the phone right now, ordering flowers for the woman who would occupy his bed tonight.

  “I’ll tell him.” Marie took a step toward the office. “I never pass up the chance to lay my eyes on that particular delicious piece of man.”

  Gabby’s teeth painfully ground together and heat slammed into her. “He is not a piece of man, as you so uncouthly put it. He’s kind and caring and an all-around really great guy.”

  “Wow.” The corners of Marie’s lips lifted, her dark eyes sparkled. “A little protective of him, aren’t you?”

  Hell yes, she was protective of him! The connection she felt to Nikolai was insane and totally unexplainable. Every night he starred in her dreams, doing all kinds of dirty things to her. Every day she prayed it would be the day he took her in his arms and changed her life forever. And she had an uncanny knack of knowing when he was around, like he was a wave point and she was the freakin’ GPS.

  She glared at her friend. “Do you want to get coffee or not?”

  “Coffee. Definitely coffee.” Marie started for the door. “How ‘bout tonight after work I take you for a massage? You seem a bit tense. It’ll be my treat, an engagement gift.” When Gabby didn’t answer right away, Marie added, “Come on, it’ll be fun.”

  “Yeah. Sure.” Not.

  All Gabby really wanted to do was sit down with the man residing in her thoughts, and talk to him, touch him—maybe rip his clothes off and show him just how much she wanted to assist him. For the rest of his life!

  Chapter Three

  Hurt and anger equaled seriously pissed off. Natasha had given some of the best years of her long life to that bastard. She’d loved Nikolai Voinea with her heart, with her body, and had gotten nothing but the shaft!

  And damn her straight to hell!

  As much as she hated him, she still loved him with everything she had.

  She stalked around the parlor of the home she shared with her sister. Her mind was reeling. She’d heard through the contacts she still had at Voinea Enterprises that the little bitch had finally sunk her claws into Nikolai.

  It’d taken three years, but they were finally engaged.

  A frustrated scream roared out of her throat, causing the windows to shake in their panes.

  “What is your problem!” Elizabeth snapped. “I’m trying to bake a cake for the new neighbors and your shrieking made it fall.”

  She wiped her flour covered hands on the front of her bright pink apron and pushed back a wayward blond curl from her forehead.

  “I don’t know why you bother.” Natasha wrapped her fingers around a crystal candlestick and threw it, taking great satisfaction when it smashed against the wall next to the window. “A vampire taking baked goods to the neighbors is a tad ridiculous, don’t you think?”

  “I’m just trying to be nice. Mother didn’t raise us to be rude.”

  “Mother has been dead for a hundred years.” Natasha stepped toward the window, smiling at the crunch of glass under her sole. She plucked at the lace curtains with her fingertips. The neighborhood, with its quiet streets, perfectly kept yards, and humans who waved to each other at every chance, was like something that belonged in a damned Norman Rockwell painting.

  Elizabeth huffed. “You know what, just forget it.”

  Natasha whirled, her eyes narrowed so tightly she could barely see her annoying sister. “Nikolai is engaged to the little tramp he replaced me with.”

  Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Replaced you?”

  “Yes, the one he gave my job to just after he fired me.”

  “Come on, Nat, it’s not like you gave him a choice. Nikolai is a man of his word. Did you really expect him to not follow through? You were warned to let the human be. But you couldn’t leave well enough alone; slicing her tires and breaking every piece of glass on her car.” Elizabeth tsked her tongue and shook her head. “I would’ve thought after living for more than a century you’d have learned—”

  “Don’t.” Natasha’s anger plunged the temperature into arctic. “He will pay for this betrayal. I will not allow him to mock me.”

  “Mock you?” Elizabeth laughed softly. “How exactly has he mocked you? Does his heart beat in your presence? I’ve never heard it.”

  Natasha continued to glower, refusing to even consider the possibility that Gabrielle might be Nikolai’s heartmate. The thought was just too painful.

  Natasha had gotten only a few short years with Nikolai, and it’d only been five since they’d broken up. She still wanted him, wanted him to be hers for eternity. The two of them could have been very happy together if the stupid little human hadn’t ruined everything.

  It was obvious by the way Elizabeth gnawed on her bottom lip she had more to say, more criticism, but instead of condemnation, she sighed and shook her head.

  “Let it go, let them be happy. It’s time for you to stop dwelling on other people and search for your own happiness, sister.”

  Elizabeth gave Natasha a quick hug before disappearing back into the kitchen. Natasha returned to the window. She rested her forehead against the cool glass. In this world where things could change in only a matter of seconds, there was only one thing Natasha was sure of; Nikolai would pay for making a fool of her. She just hadn’t decided how high the price would be.

  “Thanks again for taking me out.” Gabrielle’s neck hurt where her cell phone was pinched between her shoulder and her ear. “I’m home now. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

  “Gabby.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I’m worried about you.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Okay. Just promise me you won’t stress so much. ‘Cause it’ll just give you wrinkles.” Marie laughed. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Gabby stepped inside her dark apartment. She flicked the switch next to the doorway. Brightly colored pillows, throws, and rugs accented the earth tones of the furniture; a beige couch, a light oak coffee table. But Gabby’s favorite piece of furniture was the chocolate colored, overstuffed leather chair, an exact replica of the one in Niko’s office.

  She dropped her keys on the small table next to the door and hung her purse on its hook. She’d had a good time with Marie, loved being pampered, but it was really good to be home.

  Going over to her chair, she toed off her shoes and tucking her feet under her butt, sank down into the welcoming softness. She thumbed through the mail she’d retrieved from the mailbox in the hall. Bills. Bills. And more bills.

  She tossed the letters on the coffee table. A couple of the envelopes skittered the length and fluttered to the floor. Right now, she didn’t have the energy to pick them up. She was exhausted. Emotionally exhausted.

  A flash caught her eye. She held her hand out in front of her, moving her finger from side to side. Fire danced within the princess cut diamond.

  Her thoughts drifted to Jayson and she smiled. She did love him. More importantly, he loved her. He would take care of her, provide for her, adore her…

  Her phone buzzed in her purse. She frowned. It was late, really late, and she considered letting the call go to voicemail. Her heart stuttered as she thought of who might be calling her.

  Nikolai.

  A shot of adrenaline sent her running for her iPhone. She jerked it out of her purse just in time to see the light dimming on Jayson’s smiling face.

  Good grief, she shouldn’t be disappointed her fiancé had been the one calling h
er.

  “I love him.” She shook her head, unsure of which man she was referring to. “This is ridiculous.”

  With a sigh, she called Jayson and went back to the chair. One ring. Two rings. She turned her head to smell the leather, which was missing only one thing—Niko’s scent.

  “Hey, babe.” Jayson sounded excited.

  “Hey.” She didn’t.

  “You okay?”

  Great, now he sounded worried.

  She cringed and tried to put a chipper tone in her voice. And failed. “Yeah, just tired. It’s been a long day. I’m gonna take a shower and head for bed.”

  “I could come help you with that.” He chuckled, a warm, comforting sound. She couldn’t help but smile.

  “Thanks, but I think I can handle it.”

  “If you insist … Be sure to call me if you change your mind.”

  “You’ll be the first person I call.”

  “Goodnight, Gabs, I love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  She closed the phone, tossed it on the coffee table, watching it settle next to the discarded mail. She stood and rolled her head on her shoulders. The massage hadn’t relaxed a single muscle. Or maybe the bundle of knots had nothing to do with the massage and everything to do with stress.

  Gabby felt like an oil slick. Her clothes clung to her body. Her hair hung in clumps from her scalp. She needed a shower.

  The stroll to the bathroom included a strip tease. She felt a little naughty discarding her clothes in the hallway. She looked over her shoulder at the mess. As if a little devil combated with an angel on opposing shoulders, Gabby debated whether she should pick them up.

  She shrugged. “It’s not like you’re expecting company.”

  The shower turned on with a hiss, and Gabrielle stood in front of the mirror running the whole width of one wall, over the double sinks. After losing her bra and panties, she pivoted from one side to the other, admiring the Brazilian wax she’d gotten at the spa. She felt sexy, and beautiful, and ready to be pleasured by a man who knew how to send a woman tumbling into the waves of ecstasy.