In It to Win It Read online

  “Deal.”

  Their drinks arrived. But Nate hadn’t. Later she would note that the Sam Adams he ordered hadn’t made it to the table either. Jane knew she should probably wonder where he’d gone, but with a white flag now flying, she couldn’t bring herself to care. Especially when Grayson kept looking at her the way he was now.

  His eyes sparkled as he took a long gulp of his water. He put the glass down on the table and lounged back in his chair, his arms crossed over his chest. He was perfectly at ease. And very sexy.

  She hoped that she looked as comfortable. Or at least not as freaked out as she felt.

  Their waitress showed up again. “Ready to order?”

  Jane and Grayson both looked at Nate’s still empty chair. Grayson shrugged. “Um, well, we’re kind of waiting—”

  “I can get his order when he gets back,” she said, both statement and question.

  “Okay,” Grayson said, “I’ll have a burger, medium well, American cheese, no onion.” His eyes met hers and her toes tingled. “And can you throw some cheese on the fries, please?”

  “No problem.” She nodded and turned to Jane. “And for you?”

  “Um…” Jane was still enamored by Grayson and she had a hard time thinking. The fact that he could order a cheeseburger shouldn’t have her hanging on his every word, but she was. “I’ll have the same. Thank you.”

  When they were alone again, Grayson smiled at her, making her insides go liquid. This was very dangerous territory. Every defense mechanism she had was screaming at the top of its lungs for her to get up and run away. Yet it was her damned traitorous heart, nearly pounding out of her chest that seemed to be making the decisions and kept her sitting exactly where she was.

  “Geez! It’s been forever. When was the last time we saw each other?” Before she could answer, he said, “When you blew me off for prom?”

  All her warm and fuzzy feelings froze solid, as though an iceberg had floated into the room and settled under her chair.

  She frowned and just stared at him. All of the progress they’d made was dashed. She knew it had all been too good to be true. He hadn’t changed at all. He was still a jerk. And she still wanted to cry.

  “I blew you off?” Her voice was quiet but strong. She made herself look into the golden brown depths of his eyes. With a heavy heart she told him, “This subject is totally off limits. I didn’t want to discuss it then, and I sure as hell don’t want to discuss it now.”

  ANGRY COLOR RUSHED INTO HER CHEEKS AND Grayson knew he had some serious damage control to do. Not that he blamed her for being ticked. He needed to remember that he didn’t have to front with Jane. He’d been stupid to bring up a subject that was sore for both of them. Not that he understood why—on her part.

  One thing he did know, if she walked out of the room, she was never coming back. And she would never, ever give him another chance.

  As she rose to her feet, his hand flew out and grabbed her by the arm, his fingertips touching on opposite sides just above her wrist. “Please … don’t leave.”

  She shifted from one foot to the other and glared at him. Her fingers pushed the straps of her purse further up onto her shoulder and he thought she would leave him forever.

  He stood and motioned to her seat. “Please, let’s finish our dinner.”

  The debate went on in her head; he could almost see the arguments going back and forth behind her eyes. Finally she let out a sigh and dropped her purse to the floor.

  He waited while she sat. She took a sip on her drink and kept her eyes from meeting his gaze. The sweet camaraderie they’d shared only moments ago was gone, thanks to his thoughtless comment.

  “Look, I’m sorry. I know it was stupid.” He shook his head, plowing his fingers through his hair. “It was a joke, Jane. A really poorly executed joke, but … yeah. Forgive me?”

  Her gaze met his and she smiled tightly. She sighed as if she were exhausted. “Listen, Grayson, I don’t need, nor do I want your macho, I’m-king-of-the-world crap. Be straight with me. That’s all I’ve ever wanted from you.”

  “Okay. I’ll be straight with you, if you’ll offer me the same courtesy.”

  “I always have.”

  They both nodded as if an agreement had been made. Tension still swirled in the air around them and he was afraid his next question wasn’t going to help things. But, hard as he tried, he couldn’t keep from voicing the question that had been racing around in his brain since the second she’d stepped back into his life.

  “Do you have a boyfriend? Fiancé? Husband?” He actually cringed as he said the last word and she smiled.

  That smile had always made his heart melt. When he knew her before the second tooth on the right had been twisted a bit, now it was straight and he kind of missed the endearing flaw. As he waited for her to answer his question with regards to her availability, he hated that Jane was witnessing him this way. He’d never felt so vulnerable … and he didn’t like the feeling.

  “No. No. And … no,” she said with a laugh.

  He let out his breath, surprisingly relieved to hear that she was unattached. He was relieved until she turned the tables on him.

  “What about you?” she asked. “How many girlfriends do you actually have?”

  That made him laugh too, although it sounded strangled to his ears. He shrugged and gave her the honesty he’d promised. “Would you believe there’s not a single special girl in my life?”

  “Not a single special girl? So there are what; ten, twelve, a baker’s dozen?”

  Her words were a slap, taking all the humor from the moment. His laugh cut off abruptly and he felt his smile morph into a grimace. “I’m not the guy the media wants to make me out to be.”

  He would have thought that, of all people, Jane Alexander would understand how the media could manipulate things to fit into any box they wanted. He hated that that was the man she knew.

  “Sorry.” She stirred the lemon around in her glass with her straw and chewed on her bottom lip. She looked adorable and, absurdly, he suddenly wanted to kiss that lip. He realized he was leaning toward her when she asked, “If they’ve got you so wrong, who are you then?”

  He was just about to answer, had even opened his mouth to do so, when they were interrupted by the waitress delivering their burgers. “Can I get you anything else?”

  Jane’s eyes shot toward the door then to Nate’s chair and he imagined her thinking, Yeah, you can bring Nate back.

  He knew he should probably care that Nate had abandoned her, but he couldn’t find one single ounce of remorse. Grayson was glad to have Jane all to himself. Their first few moments had been a little weird. He hoped that given a few minutes alone they would fall into the easy friendship they’d shared all those years ago—until life blew up in his face, for reasons he still didn’t know.

  Grayson glanced at Jane and she shook her head. “No, we’re good. Thanks,” he said, dismissing the waitress.

  JANE COULDN’T HELP BUT WONDER WHERE the hell Nate had disappeared to. It didn’t take that long to use the restroom. Least of all for Nate. He was a speed-pee’er.

  Trying not to make the situation more bizarre, she opened the bottle of ketchup and dumped a huge glob next to her fries. She double-fisted her burger and took a huge bite.

  Grayson was also chewing on his burger. He groaned softly and Jane giggled. He grinned.

  “You like?” he asked after he’d swallowed.

  “Um-hmm. Not as good as the drive-in back home, but good.”

  “Agreed.”

  The heavy beat of an eighties rock song started. It was one she recognized, one that, if she were home—and in the shower—she’d be singing every word at the top of her lungs. Her foot tapped under the table. His leg moved against hers and she smiled.

  “I love these guys,” he said, setting his burger on his plate. He wiped his napkin over his mouth and then licked his lips before taking a quick draw on his straw. “They’re one of my all-time favorite
bands.”

  “Def Leppard.” She nodded, wiping her mouth with her napkin. “They’re classic! And one of my favorites, too.”

  He drummed his fingers on the table and sang along with the chorus. Grayson had a nice voice. He always had. Pretty much Grayson could do anything he set his mind to. Jane, on the other hand, couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket. Given that fact, she allowed him to finish the improvised concert … himself, clapping when he finished.

  She laughed and sat back in her chair, admiring him. His cheeks had a soft pink tone to them and she wondered if he was embarrassed by her praise. She didn’t want to investigate the feelings of accomplishment that thought brought. She couldn’t go there. Ever.

  The conversation turned to music—a nice, safe topic—and she breathed a sigh of relief. His tastes were similar to hers. Although high school had been the late nineties, they both loved the hair bands of the eighties.

  “Can you believe that I bought a fifteen cd set from an infomercial? It was a totally stupid purchase since I had all the songs on their original cds.” He shook his head. She smiled at him and couldn’t believe how relaxed she felt. “I guess the part about me being frivolous with my money is true.”

  She shrugged, understanding frivolous purchases. Her Achilles heel was books. She’d go without eating if it meant she could get a book from her favorite author on the day it came out. She laughed lightly. “At least you have the money to be frivolous with. You’re not in debt up to your eyeballs, are you?”

  She felt her eyes go wide and bit down hard on her tongue in punishment. The conversation had been going so well and she’d just asked a question she had no right to ask.

  Instead of glaring at her and spitting a harsh reprimand—which she fully deserved—he didn’t even look offended when he answered, “Nope.”

  He took another big bite of his burger and chewed. The muscles in his jaw flexed with the movement of his teeth. Jane forced herself to focus on her food and popped a fry in her mouth. It was really good; hot, crunchy and salty. She finished one fry and ate another two before finding the courage to talk to him again.

  “Do you eat here a lot?” she asked between bites.

  He shook his head, chewing until he finished the bite in his mouth. “I wouldn’t say a lot. I do like to eat here and try to stop in when we’re in town. It doesn’t always work out that way, though. You like it then?”

  “Um-hmm.” She wiped the napkin over her mouth. “Good call on adding cheese to the fries.”

  “My mom says that cheese always makes it better.” He laughed. His eyes softened at the mention of his mother. Jane also felt a slight tug at her heartstrings at the reference to Maude Pierce. “Cheese and butter. If you feel the need to substitute margarine, then don’t bother cooking.” His voice had gone into a high-pitched, nearly perfect imitation of his mother’s and Jane burst out laughing.

  “I think I heard her say that once or twice with my own ears.” Jane loved Mrs. Pierce. The woman was kind and, despite her beliefs of cheese and butter, was stick thin. “How is she these days?”

  As soon as the question was asked, Jane prayed the dear woman hadn’t died in some tragic twist of fate. She’d been healthy as a horse the last time Jane had seen her—a near lifetime ago.

  Grayson took a drink of his water then wiped his mouth with his napkin. “She’s good. She’s still in Salina; working at the 5 and Dime.” A panicked expression crossed his face and his eyes were vulnerable when he looked at her. “Please keep that off the record, Janie. The last thing I need is for somebody to print that my mother works because—” He used his fingers to form air quotes. “—I won’t take care of her.”

  Jane wasn’t sure what possessed her to do it, but she grabbed his hand. It was enormous compared to hers. She squeezed it gently, leaning across the table to promise with every ounce of who she was. “Don’t worry, Grayson. Your secret is safe with me. I have no doubt that she refuses to quit because it’d put a damper on her social schedule.”

  His eyes met hers and there was a moment of … of what? She couldn’t be sure. Just a moment. A moment where time seemed to stop. A moment where she couldn’t find her voice, couldn’t blink, couldn’t even take a breath. She wasn’t sure if her heart beat.

  He squeezed her hand and the spell was broken. But far from forgotten—at least for her. With his eyes still locked on her face, his lips lifted at the corners and he laughed softly. “I’m surprised that you remember her so well.

  “I’m full of surprises,” she said in a horribly breathless tone. Why didn’t she just tell him how he affected her?

  “Yes, you are.” His eyes dropped to her lips.

  Good grief, was it hot in here?

  The evening had started out awkward and Jane had fought the urge to bolt, had actually been on her feet once. Now though, she was completely comfortable. In fact, never before had she been so comfortable with any guy.

  But this wasn’t just any guy.

  This was Grayson Pierce.

  4

  “COME ON, JANE, YOU CAN’T STAY MAD AT me forever.” Nate was sitting next to her on the airplane. “And you can’t tell me that you’re upset I left.”

  After dinner with Grayson, and the battle over who would pay—he did—they’d come out of their inner sanctum to find Nate perched at the bar. He had gone to the bathroom, like he’d said, but then he’d not felt the need to return. He passed the time by plopping down on a bar stool.

  “You were both laughing and I didn’t want to intrude. You know you had a good time, admit it. I saw the way you looked at him.”

  “And how was that?” she snapped, forgetting that she wasn’t speaking to him.

  He grinned. “Like you wanted to eat him.”

  She scowled at him. “Crass much?”

  “Not like that—or maybe just like that. Who am I to judge?” He raised his brows and smiled, showing all of his perfectly straight, white teeth.

  Her eyes rolled without a conscious thought. “If you can’t be serious, I’m going to go back to ignoring you.”

  “You looked at him like you liked him.”

  “So?”

  “So, he was looking at you the same way. I didn’t want to impose … because it looked to me like there was actually something to impose on.” One beefy shoulder lifted in a shrug. “At the airport, I really did think I’d have to run interference. I also knew that Dale would love an exclusive with Grayson Pierce, ass or not. I don’t want you hurt and was glad to play the bodyguard. But it took about a second and a half to realize that I wasn’t needed.”

  Jane huffed, irritated … because he was spot on. Dammit!

  “I was only out at the bar. It’s not like I left you without a way back to the hotel. Besides it gave me some time to catch up with Roxie. She said hi, by the way.”

  He was quiet for a few minutes then cleared his throat. “Speaking of Roxie.”

  Technically, they’d been ‘speaking of Roxie’ a few minutes ago, but she’d take any segue she could get if it meant they didn’t have to talk about Grayson anymore.

  “What about Roxie?”

  “Her birthday’s coming up,” he said. Jane waited for him to go on. When she just stared at him, he finally said, “It’s her fortieth.”

  Again Jane thought ‘okay’.

  “Anyway, I thought it would be nice to throw her a surprise party.”

  “Yeah, that’d be great.”

  The flight attendant brought some peanuts and a drink. Jane hated that they never handed over the can. She sipped at her Diet Coke while Nate opened a packet of peanuts and dumped the whole thing into his mouth. His head was tipped back so far, Jane was amazed the guy didn’t choke on the nuts. He was quiet while he chewed. Then he swallowed and guzzled the tiny cup of soda.

  “Would you mind helping me with her party?”

  “Me?” Jane asked, genuinely surprised.

  She considered Roxy a friend, and vice versa. But they weren’t the daily-phone-call
s-just-to-check-in kinda friends. That was where Kate Spencer—or even Jordan’s wife and producer, Olivia—fit in.

  “You’re perfect. She won’t expect you throwing her a party. It’ll be easy to plan because you and I are together so much. I mean, hell, we can even stop and look at cakes on the way to or from a story.” He was sporting a grin that spread from one ear to the other. “So, will you do it?”

  “Sure.” She could solicit Molly’s help if needs be. “No problem.”

  He was quiet for a few minutes then closed his eyes and went to sleep. Not wanting to be left alone with her thoughts, Jane laid her head on his shoulder and slept.

  It was the tensing of Nate’s shoulder muscles that woke her. She jerked back and looked at him. Every inch of him was preparing for landing. He gripped the armrests until his knuckles turned the color of chalk. The muscles in his jaw jumped as he ground his teeth. His eyes were clamped shut. The guy was stiff as a board. She wasn’t even sure he breathed for the few minutes it took for the tires to kiss the asphalt.

  Then with an exaggerated breath, Nate’s entire body relaxed and he was once again calm. “What’dya say we get our stuff and get to the hotel?”

  “Sounds good to me.”

  AN HOUR LATER, JANE WAS ALONE IN HER room. She took a quick shower and put on her favorite pajamas; bottoms that were pink and red vertical stripes and a matching pink tank-top. It was too early for bed, but she wanted to be comfortable. It wasn’t like she had anyone she was trying to impress.

  The knock on the door made her jump and cringe. Good hell, she was a mess. A clean mess, but a mess nonetheless. Running her fingers through her still damp hair that had somehow developed tangles since being brushed, she went to the door and looked out the peephole.

  Disappointment made her heart stutter. It wasn’t too far-fetched to think it would be Grayson.

  The last time someone knocked on her hotel room door, it had been him. This time it wasn’t. Nor was it Nate. Standing on the other side of the door was a hotel worker, holding a box. She opened the door until the chain pulled taut.